I Get Poetic When Boredom Hits...

11:15:00 PM

Good evening!
Or maybe afternoon, or probably morning... Wherever you are, whatever time it is where you are, I hope you're having a splendid day!

You know, before everything happened (the national examination, the announcement, the college admission, etc.) I was always craving for some day-offs. I mean, school was so much pain back then but now, when I re-think of it... I kinda wanna go back to school. With school, my life became systematic. I knew what I had to do. I had my assignments stacked up on my desk every night. I had proposals for some events at school that I needed to edit. Life became more or less like a to-do list. Being a perfectionist (and a control-freak), I like having things planned out. School provided me with that. I kinda miss it now.
I'm not saying day-offs are a major disappointment, of course not. What I'm intending to say is that it gets more boring over the weeks. I am grateful for everything, nonetheless. With the wonderful announcement and a few steps ahead from being an official freshman at college, life is so far away from sucking itself. However, it gets too monotonous somewhere along those free times. And I began to lose sight of my to-do list because I started to realize that I basically have not much to do. I need to at least create something out of this boredom. Otherwise my head will start bombarding me with unnecessary thoughts. So, what have I been doing these past few weeks?
Some random selfies. Me facing boredom be like...
All I have been doing is waking up very early in the morning to do my morning prayer, go back to sleep until 8 or 9 a.m., failing myself to workout to get into better shape (hahaha-_-), take a shower, if I'm not fasting I probably eat my breakfast at 10 or 11 a.m., play some keyboard and sing some songs that I've memorized from years ago, do my afternoon prayer, take a very long nap, do my prayer again, if I'm fasting I most likely wait for the break-fasting call, I do my evening prayer, chat with some friends on LINE, spend some hours on my social medias, do my last prayer of the day, and go to sleep. It goes the same every single day until a few days ago my dad asked me to write a new book so I can actually invest my time in something productive. Thanks, Dad:') I've been doing the same routine for more than a week ever since the announcement was out. Imagine being so used to doing nothing productive... It kills my creativity. It kills my brain all at once. I hate not having specific things to do. There are plenty of DIY's I can actually make but since I'm so used to doing absolutely nothing, I feel like I never have the time to make something creative. That, to me, is even more dangerous than sleeping too late at night. It sets me into a writer-block mode. And I hate it.

I'm not saying I hate day-offs.

I kinda do but it's just because of the boring routine I have to face everyday. Day-offs are fun, I'm not gonna deny that. But figuring out what to do with it is not so much especially when you're stuck at home 24/7 with absolutely no goals. Ugh!

Now I'm just whining...

Anyway, to redeem my boring life I have been overthinking about ten millions different things. I wish I can write a brief summary for all of those but words are just not enough. However, poetry will kind of does it justice. I tend to get poetic when I'm bored with life or when emotional things happen in my life. So, tonight will probably be my first ever shot again after not writing a poem for so long. Bear with me:') It will be in Indonesian and I'm really sorry if you don't speak the language.

Here goes nothing...

###

Elipsis
oleh yasminhanan.

Adalah jarak.
Adalah waktu.
Adalah rindu.
Adalah hampa.
Adalah jeda.
Adalah sepi.
Adalah yang tak terucap ahli sastra.
Adalah satu-satunya yang dapat terucap oleh amatiran belaka.
Adalah kata yang tak mampu bersuara.
Adalah suara yang tak mampu berkata-kata.
Adalah kecewa.

Elipsis
Adalah aku,
Adalah kamu,
Adalah kita.

Sampai kapan aku harus tetap menganggap perasaanku tak pernah ada,
Menghilangkan apa yang nyata,
Bersembunyi di balik tanda,
Di balik jarak, waktu, rindu, jeda,
Hampa, sepi,
Dan kembali merasa kecewa?
Sampai kapan kau mau diam saja dengan sengaja?
Bergeming, seolah aku adalah segalanya yang pantas kau bungkam dengan tanda
elipsis?

Bekasi, 24 Mei 2016.

###

There goes me and my lacking creativity.

I don't even have a clue of what I just wrote. I might say it's personal but I don't really have anyone or anything at all in mind. The need of creating something was all I needed to make a poem like that.  A little push, I might say. And by the way, you should really check out what ellipsis is if you have no idea what that is.

Yeah, I think that's it.

If you like this kind of post where I become a poet all of a sudden, let me know. It's kind of fun rather than just talking about random stuff like... boredom, clothes, foods, chocolate, pizza. See, even that is too random. And if you like to see a deeper, more meaningful post from me just let me know or maybe it will come to my senses. I've already got something in mind but I'm gonna have to contemplate and think about it before letting it out on here. Because the subject is so sensitive and it's become somewhat a frequently asked question on my ask.fm.

(here's the link to my ask.fm!)

Anyway, that's all. Sorry if this one is rather shorter than any of the other posts. I'm just overall bored and I'm lucky I can still write something like that with all these dead brain cells caused by a much too long holiday. Hahaha...

Oh and before I go, I just wanna say...
GOOD LUCK!


to all my friends who are facing SBMPTN on May 31st 2016. You have all my best wishes. I know you can conquer those problems in seconds. Practice really does make perfect. I am sure that the result will pay off all those sweats and sleepless nights. You've sacrifice so much time to study for something great and you're gonna get it. I have a feeling you'll succeed. I'll see you soon in campus, loves. Best of luck for all of you, especially for my dearest ones, wanderlust<3
Also, good luck to my brother who is currently having his final exam this week. Please dude, study your butt off. I thought you were gonna apply to ITB or something for a quite challenging major. Don't start lacking on your study... I'll kick your butt off if the result does not get any better. I promise I will. Good luck, lil' bro!

Okay...
Bye, then! See you real soon! Thank you for reading:)

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